Somewhere to Call Home
by Elise Jackson
Summary: Olivia is faced with a case that will shake her to the very core. Can she get through the case without becoming to emotionally involved? Or will this be the case that pushes her over the edge? Read and find out.
1. Chapter 1

**Disclaimer: I don't own Law and Order SVU**

Chapter One

"Benson, Stabler, there's a case waiting for you on your desk's." Captain Cragen announced as he came out of his office to find his top four detectives filing in the door

for another busy day in Special Victims. "Munch, Fin, you've got the same one on yours. This is going to be a long one people, prepare yourselves."

Olivia watched Cragen walk over to the large white board where all the information was held for larger cases, like this one apparently, and he taped a picture up. The

photo was of an infant, maybe three months old, blood soaked the bottom half of the tiny body.

Her breath got caught in her throat.

"Jane Doe, three months old." He paused as he put up two more pictures beside it. The first picture was of a woman, the mother, she had a gunshot wound to her

temple, and the second was of a man, with a matching gunshot wound to his. "Mary and Joshua Lewis, matching gunshot wounds to the head. Their daughter," he

pointed to the photo of the bloody infant. "her name is unknown, she has no living relatives."

"Captain, that baby is alive?" Elliot asked the question that no one else had voiced, but all were thinking it.

Cragen solemnly nodded, "this baby, believe it or not, was raped." He took a deep breath and continued, "the perp came into the Lewis home at approximately four-

thirty in the morning. He went to the bedroom of Mary and Joshua Lewis and shot them both in their sleep. He then moved to the nursery, as far as the doctors can tell he

cut the baby with a knife until he was able to fit himself inside her, finished, and fled the scene."

Olivia covered her mouth in shock.

"The paperboy noticed the baby crying when he dropped off the paper and assumed something was wrong and phoned the police." Cragen took a step back from the

board, "I want this bastard behind bars. Munch and Fin, try to find anything about this family. Stabler and Benson, you two head to the scene and see if you can get

anything from the neighbors."

As soon as the Captain shut the door to his office, all four detectives turned to look at each other, all with the same look of shock on their faces. Olivia walked closer to

the board that held the photos, "how the hell can someone rape a three month old baby."

"How the hell can a baby survive that much trauma?" Elliot countered.

Fin was the first to make the move to his desk. "Well, you heard the Captain, let's find that bastard."

Munch followed Fin's lead and was the second to jump into action. Elliot grabbed his jacket and the keys for his and Olivia's squad car. "Come on Liv, let's head out."

She didn't move.

"Liv, are you okay?" Elliot tapped her on the shoulder.

Olivia whirled around and grabbed her jacket from her desk chair. "Let's go." Her tone spoke volumes, she was upset and she wasn't going to admit it in front of the

whole Unit.

Once they were in the squad car and on their way to the scene Olivia opened up to her partner of two years. "El, how could someone do that?" She was starting to get

choked up and she hated it, she never wanted Elliot to think that she couldn't handle the job. "Why would someone do that?"

Elliot gave her a sympathetic look, "Liv, the important thing is that the baby is still alive." He paused a moment taking a quick glance at his partner to make sure she

was listening. "We will never know, or understand why these monsters do what they do."

Olivia knew Elliot was right, but it still bothered her, it always would.

They pulled up to the scene and exited the vehicle in unison. Elliot led the way, partly to get the whole thing over with so they could get to finding the guy, but mostly

because he knew Olivia was having a rough time with this case and he wanted to shield her from it as much as possible. As he entered the house and made his way

towards the stairs leading to the second floor, the smell of blood was clearly in the air. Olivia was close behind him and together they walked up the stairs and down to

the master bedroom. There was blood on the bed where the husband and wife had laid, but other than that, there was no other sign of disturbance.

Next, the two walked to the nursery. Elliot heard Olivia take in a deep breath as they looked at the horrifying scene before them. Unlike the parent's room, the blood was

everywhere it seemed, the crib, the floor, the walls, and even on random toys that were scattered on the floor.

"El, I can't do this. I need to get out." Elliot turned around to see his partner jogging down the stairs and out the front door.

Olivia made it to the squad car, before she was finally able to take a full breath. It had been a long time since one of her cases bothered her this much. The cases that

involved little children were rough enough, but an infant, that was a killer. For years she had wanted to me a mother, but she knew with a job like this one, it would never

happen. The cases that involved children were hard, because whenever she had to talk to them, or help them get past things, all she wanted to do was take them home

with her and keep them safe.

Elliot came walking towards the car, "You okay Liv?"

She nodded and threw on a professional smile, "yeah I'm fine, just a bit shaken up that's all."

"Good. Well we didn't find any information about relatives, or any friends for that matter. It seems like they just moved here. They have no connections whatsoever."

Elliot said with raised eyebrows and then continued, "and that means that the baby will be put into the system if she survives."

Olivia shook her head, "I can't imagine. Just think, that poor baby will never know her real parents." She was about to lose control of her emotions so she quickly

asked, "where are we going next?"

"The hospital, the Captain wants us to check up on the baby." He said in a solemn voice.

As she got in the car and buckled her seat belt, Olivia couldn't help but to feel sick to her stomach. The poor baby girl that they were about to visit, was a result of a

rape, before she could even realize what life was her life had already been taken away from her. So as she rested her head back on the car seat, Olivia shot up a prayer

to God that He would help the baby to live, and that she would be put into the best home, with the greatest family in the world.


	2. Chapter 2

Chapter 2

The hospital was filled to the brim, Olivia and Elliot weaved in and out of numerous patients, nurses, and doctors on their way to Intensive Care. Although visiting victims in the hospital was part of her job, Olivia hated it. The smell, the people that were dying, or in pain, even the look of the place was enough to make her feel depressed. As she followed Elliot through the maze of hallways and doors, they finally reached their destination.

Looking at the baby laying comfortably inside a hospital bassinet, aside from the IV's and oxygen taped to her tiny nose, one would almost think this baby had not just gone through a horrible rape, but perhaps just had a regular surgery. The nurse that was attending the tiny infant turned to face the two detectives.

"Hello, can I help you?" She inquired.

Elliot took charge, "uh, yeah. We are investigating the case of this little girl and were wondering if you could fill us in on her condition."

The nurse gave almost a sad smile. "This is one lucky baby, a few more minutes of bleeding out and we wouldn't have been able to save her."

Olivia wanted to cry.

"She still isn't out of the woods yet, but she will be monitored carefully throughout the night and next couple of days." The nurse paused to flip through the chart she held. "She had severe trauma to the vaginal area, they were able to stitch everything back up in surgery, but only time will tell how she will heal. " Closing the chart she looked back up at the detectives, "the doctor says since she is so young, her body still developing, she has a very high chance of healing almost one hundred percent."

Olivia let out a sigh of relief; the baby was going to be ok. She leaned over the sleeping infant and gently caressed the tiny hand. "You hear that little one? You are going to be okay!" She whispered quietly.

"Thank you for your help, if there is any change in her condition could you please let us know?" Elliot handed the woman his card.

She took it and nodded, "I would be happy to. Have a good day."

As they left the hospital Olivia couldn't help, but to breathe a sigh of relief. Even though this case was nowhere near to being solved, at least the baby would be okay if she survived the next couple of days, and by the sound of it the doctors didn't see any reason that she wouldn't.

Elliot looked across the car at her as they opened their doors. "Are you doing okay Liv? If this case is too much, I can take you home." He caught her, 'I'm fine' glare and quickly answered. "I'm just checking, that's all."

They both entered the car and started the drive back to the precinct to find out what the Captain had for them next. When they reached the 1-6, Olivia led the way in, making a beeline for the Captain's office.

"Captain!" She shouted, causing him to jump in his seat.

He collected himself then answered, "yes Olivia, what is it?"

"I'm...I'm sorry Captain I didn't mean to yell. I wanted to inform you that the baby is going to be okay." She paused and corrected her statement. "Well she isn't out of the woods yet, but they are pretty sure she will make almost a complete full recovery if she makes it through the next few days."

"That's wonderful to hear, Olivia. Now have you and Elliot met with Munch and Fin yet to collaborate what you have found out so far about the case?" He spoke authoritatively to her, but tried to keep his tone light.

Olivia blushed deeply, slightly embarrassed at her outburst. "No we haven't, but I will go do that right now."

Cragen watched as Olivia left his office. She was getting dangerously close to this case. He made a mental note to keep an eye on her.

A close eye.


	3. Chapter 3

Chapter Three

Six hours had gone by, finally the Captain came out of his office to order his detectives to head home and get some sleep, and told them that they would start fresh the next morning. Olivia said goodnight to everyone and made her way to her SUV, she wasn't planning on going home just yet, her thoughts all day were on the tiny infant in the hospital and all she wanted to do was be there. Twenty minutes later she walked into the room where the nurse was preparing a bottle for the baby.

"She is eating on her own now?" Olivia questioned, remembering the IVs from earlier in the day.

The nurse, a different nurse than before, smiled at Olivia. "You must be Olivia; Lena said you may stop by. This baby is coming back to full health so quickly; we are calling her our miracle baby." She held out the bottle to Olivia, "would you like to feed her?"

Olivia nodded her head and made her way to the hospital rocking chair that was placed beside the bassinet. The nurse gently placed the baby in Olivia's arms and handed her the tiny bottle. As soon as the baby was secured in her arms, Olivia gave her the bottle and the tiny baby sucked at it eagerly.

"Stay as long as you would like, if you need anything my name is Brooke, I will be at the nurse's station right outside." Brooke smiled sweetly and left Olivia and the baby alone in the small room.

Elliot had been home for nearly an hour before he decided to text Liv. He wanted to see how she was doing and to find out once and for all if she was okay or not. The case was certainly toying with her emotions; any one of them could see it in her while they went over the case trying to dig up anything they could find. He knew his partner, could read her like an open book, and he knew she didn't admit easily when things bothered her.

'_Hey.'_

He sent the simple text. Nearly fifteen minutes went by before she answered.

'_Yeah El, what's up?'_

She sounded like she was busy. His curiosity peaked.

'_Where are you?'_

Another slow fifteen minutes passed.

_'Uh, I'm home El. What do you need?'_

She was lying. Elliot pressed the call button and waited for her to pick up; when she did her voice was hushed.

"Listen El, I'm busy. Can I call you back in the morning? Better yet, can it wait until I see you at work tomorrow?"

"Where are you?" He questioned as he shrugged on his jacket, ready to head to wherever she was. "And tell me the truth, I know you aren't home."

She didn't answer at first and he could almost hear in the way her breathing had changed that she was searching for an excuse. Finally she answered.

"I'm at the hospital."

He knew it.

"I'm on my way; I'll bring you a hot tea from Dunkin and something to eat." He was already on the way; he knew she wouldn't be able to stay away from that baby this long.

Twenty minutes later he walked into the room where Olivia and the baby were. The baby was sleeping soundly in Liv's arms and the picture was enough to take his breath away. His partner had always wanted a baby girl of her own for as long as he had known her. She hadn't told anyone but him and he wouldn't have even known except that it had slipped out once while they were working on a child rape case a few months after she and he became partners.

He pulled up a chair beside her and gently stroked the baby's cheek with his finger. "She is precious isn't she?"

"Mhmm." Liv nodded in agreement. "I've been here nearly an hour and I can't pull myself away."

Elliot turned his chair to the side so that he was facing her. "Liv, be honest with me. Is this case to much for you?"

Olivia stared back at Elliot, unable to speak for a moment. His piercing blue eyes had the look of genuine care and possibly a hint of a friendship kind of love. The man before her was so attractive in many ways, from his short, clean hair cut to his toned body, but the one thing she could never peel her eyes away from was those eyes. This time the look was almost enough to make her break down and cry. She trusted him with her whole heart; Olivia could tell him almost everything.

"I'll be honest with you El; it is taking a huge toll on my emotions." She smiled sadly, "but I'll be okay. I can handle it."

Elliot reached over and gave her free hand a gentle squeeze. "Well, you let me know if it does start to become something you can't handle, okay?"

"Okay." She whispered.

Olivia's heart was starting to beat fast, and it was getting difficult for her to breathe. It wasn't because of Elliot's questioned, but because she had just realized something…

Elliot was still holding on to her hand.


End file.
